Overcoming Doubt

Great question for today. Chris wrote and asked, "What have you done, as a writer, to overcome and keep on writing in seasons of doubt and discouragement?"

Okay, much as I hate to reveal this, here's what my head tells me at times:

-Good Lord, you're awful.

-Nobody is EVER going to read this piece of tripe.

-You don't make enough money at this. Why don't you get a real job?

-This isn't working. You should at least check into the openings at Target.

-You're lazy. Your words are turgid. You don't know anything about this.

-Go check your emails again. Maybe find out if there's anything new on ESPN.com.

-You're going to fail! You'll live in a trailer, eat lard, and they'll have to lift your lazy butt out of there with a crane.

All of this comes to me, not with a subtle whisper, but in a screaming rush. Even now.

Um...maybe some of it is true. So I can think of a few things that help me get over it.

1. BIC. That's writer-talk for butt-in-chair. If I'll just sit down and start doing work, it's amazing how things start to get done.

2. My "Sunshine" file. Yeah, it's true. I keep a file of emails people have sent to me that basically say, "You helped me" or "Thanks for being wise." For years I kept a file folder of cards and letters people had sent, just to perk me up. I might be a total putz TODAY, but I can always look back and remember, "Hey...you were BETTER THAN A PUTZ that time!"

3. Friends. Cec and I send each other encouraging notes once in a while. Steve Laube too. Keri Kent. Greg Johnson. My buddies. I occasionally get the nicest messages from Jenny B Jones, or Rachel Hauk will say something nice on my blog. I sometimes call my best friend Mike and he'll remind me that I need to stop stressing and do some actual work now and then. People who understand what it's like to be a writer, or to be in publishing, can be tremendously helpful.

4. The monthly bills. You might think this is odd, but nothing motivates me like having to pay bills. And realizing that, once again, I've somehow stumbled my way through another month, and they're not going to turn off the lights or repossess my computer (though it's a PC, and I'd happily hand it to them). Hey! Another month down and I fooled them again!

5. Exercise. The world is a bright place when I force myself to run.

6. Coffee. 'Nuff said. Try Tully's if you haven't yet.

7. A walk outside. Getting into what GOD made, and not always being surrounded by what MAN made is a wonderful refresher.

8. Asking someone close to you to say something nice. It's an amazing thing, but if Patti says something positive about my work, I seem to have more motivation to get it completed. (I wouldn't suggest you all call my wife and ask her to say something nice, however. This may not work as well for the rest of you.)

Comments

[Nicole Unice]

So true. Thanks for sharing what I'm sure every writer goes through. Just this week I sent out a pitiful "pray for me" email...but a little humility and honesty with close friends goes a long way.

I'm also motivated by the "sit there and do something" train of thought. When the words come painfully slow, I'll tell myself, "sit here for 45 minutes and just see what happens." Alternatively, I'll use my laptop and tell myself to keep writing until the battery goes low.

Then of course, there's the TRULY pitiful "you still love me, right" that I shout out to my hubs...which I follow up with "this is worth it, right?" He's sweet to oblige and give me encouragement.

[Leah Morgan]

Thanks. I came to your blog today with rage and self loathing and found comfort in your admissions, particularly the self accusations of laziness. Those declarations are so much more effective when you have others agreeing. I married into a family empire dug with a father's own bare hands, family and holidays be cursed. They are suspicious of people who sit and have relationships. I too admire a strong work ethic but have this annoying penchant for people that causes me to waste time celebrating Christmas and -don't let this get out- go on vacation. I manage to avoid seeming productive by being both a stay at home mother and someone who finds it difficult to write standing up. My real job is keeping them inspired. They see a slacker like me and really get motivated.

[Jodie]

Thank you, thank you, thank you! You could have pulled every one of those questions out of my head just this WEEK. Sometimes I think the devil dosen't have to bother attacking us, because we do a pretty bang-up job of messing up our own heads. I'm SO thankful for other writers who come alongside and talk us off the ledge, and for honesty like what you wrote in this blog today. It's so much easier when we all know we're not alone!

[Elle]

Glad to see I'm not the only one having a confidence crisis.
All good advice,I like the idea of the sunshine file,amazing how even the most random comment can cheer you up and put the smile back on your face.

[Linda Yezak]

A "Sunshine" file! What a wonderful idea! I actually do have notes and emails that say things other than, "you write well, but..."
I need to find them and save those suckers for these blasted rainy days I'm having.

[Janice Thompson]

I'd be willing to bet your Sunshine file is plump, Chip.

[Pam Halter]

I always wonder why we are so hard on ourselves. I've come to the conclusion Christians CAN'T think good of themselves because we're wretched sinners saved by grace who shouldn't think of ourselves more highly then we ought. Pride!!! our brains scream.

But I think there's a difference between being prideful and being confident.

My writing partner (Joyce) is a terrific writer. She tells me when it's not my best writing. She also tells me when it is.

But the biggest boost I get is when I help her brainstorm a plot or character problem and she says, thanks, you really helped me. Wow - I actually helped a best-selling author! Wooooooooooo!!! Then I think, well, I must not be so bad, and I get back to my own writing feeling pretty darn good ... for at least 15 minutes. :)

[Regina Merrick]

In my life, I think nothing makes me feel more fulfilled than when I know I've encouraged someone in their writing path. They, in turn, encourage me just by a simple "Thanks for the kind words" email, which I hang on to for dear life, and like your "Sunshine File," re-read when life gets tough. I hope you know how much your blog encourages me and so many others. I truly needed this today.

[Dayle]

Great post, Chip. You know how to touch a reader's emotions, and that's what it's all about. I never thought of calling it a "Sunshine" folder, but that's perfect. Hearing from readers that you've touched in some way, or editors who say, "great job," is one of the things that keeps a writer plugging along. I'll never forget a man named Joe who wrote to thank me years later. Goose-bumps of major proportion.
http://mswrite2.xanga.com/720164901/the-note-from-joe-revisited/

[Fr Serafim Gascoigne]

So true and yet I don't have doubts about what I write, in fact I have too many stories whirling in my teeming brain. My doubt is whether I can reach my target audience...yes it's marketing and marketing. However when I abandon doubt and keep sending out those contact emails, I meet people whom I would never have met if I had allowed my doubt to take over. BTW, I don't have an agent -no one wants me, except my tech publishers, but I don't let that me stop me from telling the world what exciting stuff I have to offer teens!

[Heidi]

perfectly said! And other than the word turgid (which, oh so humbling, I had to look up) and the references to ESPN, this could be me.

I love that you not only write about the problems we writers identify with, but also the ways you've found to cope and conquer.

I'd pick a favorite strategy, but I love them all.

[Stevie Rey]

Amazing how sometimes our self-image is so skewed compared to the way other folks see us, Chip. We see you as the great Chip MacGregor who walks on water!

Great post, thanks for being vulnerable, bro, and great advice. Having suffered through countless rejection letters, and disappointments I would have quit long ago if not for my inner cheerleader. That's King Jesus on the inside. He tells me wonderful things like "Stevie Rey, you're going to be a great writer". "You can do it". "The Hillbilly Bible will be a bestseller, son, keep at it". There's no way I could have kept at this for so long with little or no results without Him. And you know what, it was years after I became a Christian that I even realized this "wonderful Counselor" was there! You know why I didn't hear Him, y'all. I just simply wasn't listening.

[Jess @ Blog Schmog]

Oh but the trailer and the crane make for such good story fodder.

Thanks for the reminder. I think I'll get off the internet and get my BIC, or maybe another cup of coffee first.

[patriciazell]

Perhaps, because I have been writing off and on since the early 1990's and have received tons of rejections with some publishing credits and some encouragement, I have toughened up and don't have many doubts. (In fact, I feel pleased about what I've accomplished in the last year--complete strangers are reading my blog.) I'm also blessed to be a teacher, so my writing is not about paying the bills and that is a huge help.

[twitter.com/Writers_Cafe]

Yet another great blog from the Master!
I'm as yet unpublished, but I'm quite confident when it comes to my book - the not-quite-ready-for-an-agent "Janelle's Time."
My lack of confidence is in my blog, but even that is coming around - these things take time . . .
I love your blog. Keep 'em coming!
Julie

[Theresa Lode]

I'm tellin ya, man...DON PABLO coffee! ;)

And I chuckled reading today's entry. Just last night I finished a draft for a magazine assignment; it's been a while since I've been published and my insecurity has been all over the place. I forced my husband to BIC *HIS* butt and read....I sniveled, "Tell me it's okay." He complied. He quit trying to figure me out a long time ago because by nature I'm very outgoing and seem very confident.

I call my Sunshine file my "Atta boy" file. I suppose I should probably call it "Atta girl" but oh well...In the words of Bob,from What About Bob? "I need, I need, I NEED!" ;)

[Keri Wyatt Kent]

Thanks, Chip. I needed this today. I have an "encouragement" folder --tho I haven't looked at in a while. Maybe I should pull it out. :)

[Rachel Hauck]

You are the best! I'm always inspired by you. What a blessing you are to me and so many.

Rachel HauCk.

[brandt Dodson]

Wow, man. Sounds like you climbed right out of my head.
I've had many of these same "demons".

[Tracey Michae'l Lewis]

Good stuff, Chip. And so very much needed. Thanks!

[terri tiffany]

Needed to hear this today as I rip apart my current WIP because of my CPs comments. Thanks!

[MisterChris]

Thanks for that open insight, Chip. It's good to see others struggle with this that are definitely further along in this than me.

I find running therapeutic too - the pain in my legs makes me forget the pain in my ego. :-)